WARNING: you're entering the zone of a disordered freak. beware.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

little bird, where have you gone.

Hier, my intake came to around 550 calories. I'm sure my control is slowly sinking back in to me, but I don't want to jinx myself. I've become very good at doing that. Today's intake has been 370 calories, and I might have a tangerine later if I feel my willpower slipping through my fingers. I apologize about my last post, again. I have these strange, depressing episodes where I have to write something morbidly disgusting, then I regret it later. Way to go, Ariana.

Are negative calorie fruits real, or is it just a myth? Everywhere I look, they have both sides of the battle. I need one side, kay thanks. One of my.. friends, K, is accusing my other friend, E, of having an eating disorder, and she's being extremely uptight about it. It's hysterical. I have to sit there at lunch biting my tongue. E is fucking pale, and always has been. She's lost quite a bit of weight over the past two years, but not drastically. I don't fucking care what either of them have to say, as long as I get skinnier. Ha.

I apologize, again, for not commenting on blogs. I've read them all, I promise. I have a month's worth of school work to catch up with because of the hospital-sick-diabetes-don'tfuckingknow situation. I was off for three-four weeks, because everyone is overreacting about the H1N1 bullshit. I'd be happy if I got the Swine Flu, it's an excuse not to eat.

Aren't I just the most pessimistic person you've ever met?



  1. Lol, Ariana, I feel the same about H1N1. Although I was praying for the vomiting part about it. I know, bad. Very bad.

    Anyway, about negative calorie foods. Here's the deal as I understand it. There is no such thing as a negative calorie food. If you put anything into your mouth, it is going to exist as part of your body until it is properly expelled. And even then, any part that was digested, will remain. However, our bodies burn calories all day long. When we sleep, when we wake... so long as we exist. But think about it. It makes sense. If our bodies didn't burn these calories, then we would gain weight every moment of every day.

    The idea behind negative calorie foods, is that it takes more energy to eat them than they provide. Now this may be so, but in the long run, does it really make a difference since our bodies are burning anyway? Negative calorie foods are really just very, very low in caloric values. Your body takes care of them quickly, regardless of whether it's because it takes more energy to digest them, or because there are so few to burn off.

    ...Maybe that suggests that NCFs do exist... but does it really matter so long as the calories are coming off?

  2. About negative calorie foods, here's the arguement that made up my mind: Celery is a negative calorie food, right? It's like THE negative calorie food. But if you ate nothing but celery--huge amounts of it though--would you starve to death? No. You'd be seriously malnourished, yes, but you wouldn't starve to death. So my guess is that they don't exist. Idk. That's just me.
    Lol. I love your pessimism. It just reflects all the things i feel... Wow that sounded really weird... but you know what i mean!

  3. NCF's don't exist, but don't be discouraged. Breathe and stay strong,