WARNING: you're entering the zone of a disordered freak. beware.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

ariana, why is that you NEVER learn from your countless mistakes?
you have yourself in a vicious cycle, m'dear, let it go.

thought one; i'm hungry. don't eat.
thought two; okay, just a little.
thought three; NOMNOMNOMNOM.
thought four; FUCK.
thought five; i will not repeat this again, remember this feeling.

THIS has been my thought process for the past two days. what is happening to me?!??

okay, forget it. no more, ariana. go do something more productive instead of crying and wallowing and attempting to purge then freaking out because it's kind of scary.
or even comment on blogs??

demain, je vais aller au quebec.
i've been speaking french since i could walk and i don't even know if that's right.
i'm supposed to be fucking bilingual. oh, i'm pathetic.

but yes, i am going to quebec for four days with some friends. this means speaking french and attempting to eat as little as possible. i will succeed, because then on saturday i agreed to get my belly button pierced.
what. the. fuck. was. i. thinking.

ariana, you're losing it. not that you really had it in the first place.

2 comments:

  1. I know the feeling exactly. First, you think you're hungry and you want to enjoy that feeling, then you stop enjoying it and want to make it go away with food... but you end up having too much food. Oh, dear, i know EXACTLY. Stay strong, sweetie. You're stronger than that food.

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  2. ohh i know what thats like. sometimes its like either i eat nothing or everything. there's no in between lately. i know you can push past this. your stronger than food. food is so insignificant compared to how far you've come.
    stay strong
    meg
    good luck on getting the belly piercing. ive always wanted one but im too much of a puss lol

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